The Turmoil of Cupcakes

I am, whether I am breaking the elastic on sweatpants or fighting against being blown away by my fan, a fat kid at heart. Food and I have carried out a torrid affair for as long as I can recall. I love fresh, over-sauced dishes arranged in ways that make me feel guilty about cutting into them. My mouth waters at sushi piled high and painstakingly assembled. I live for food that was never meant to be fried loafing about beside to a vat of ranch dressing. I’m alarmingly fond of brunch.

But our relationship is not without its turmoil, which brings me to the problem I present to you today: The Cupcake Cottage.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I adore cupcakes – it’s in my very nature to do so – but The Cupcake Cottage (http://www.thecupcakecottage.com/) stands off of Camp Bowie Boulevard mocking me as I drive by its darkened windows. Long have been the two months since I was first told of this palace, of the intoxicating scent of butter and self-rising flour drifting out of its doors. Their Web site boasts an impressive array of flavors, from cookies and cream to peanut butter cup, and even the exotic pink lemonade. Standard cupcakes are $2.25 each, which I am certainly happy to spend on the occasional mid-afternoon indulgence. In fact, often have been the times that I have set forth from my home with the hopes of finding myself in the presence of a baked masterpiece.

And this is where my love of food, this imagined romance with an iced treasure, turns sour. The Cupcake Cottage is open five days a week, Tuesday through Saturday, from 10:00am “until the last cupcake is sold!” I’m not a fan of exclamation points in general, feeling that most people should be limited to perhaps a dozen or so in their lifetime, or at least one, properly used, a month, but I stress to you that the punctuation at the end of this phrase is necessary: there is a sense of urgency that one must have when seeking to enter this cozy establishment before their doors close.

My first trip to The Cottage was, admittedly, a foolish one, as I did not realize that they were closed on Mondays and should have done my research beforehand. My second excursion revealed a sign saying “Sorry! The last cupcake has been sold!” This was close to three in the afternoon on a Saturday, which, in retrospect, was probably underestimating the public’s demand for cupcakes. But the last time I made the short trek to Camp Bowie it was scarcely after 1:00pm, and The Cupcake Cottage was once again a cloud on an otherwise sunny street. I love cupcakes, but I also love my sleep. With a full-time internship during the week, Saturday is really my only option when it comes to The Cupcake Cottage, but it is also my much-anticipated day of staying in bed until the afternoon sun forces me out. Are people really ravaging a day’s supply of baked goods in less than three hours? Is there a line at 10:00 am stretching down the length of Camp Bowie, back to the Enchanted Florist, full of citizens clamoring for a Mint Chocolate Chip delight?

The Cupcake Cottage bakers are currently on vacation, and will return to the operation a week from today. I tell myself that the following Friday is when I will stay in for the night, will turn off my phone, and then wake to my alarm the next morning, make myself presentable, and finally give myself over to the pleasure of buttercream icing.

But I’m not going to hold my breath.

I hope others have had more luck with The Cupcake Cottage than I have. If so, do let me know what I am missing out on; if it is worth my anxiety. And if you’ve never heard of the establishment, click on over to their Web site (which is newly redesigned, quelling my suspicion that they may have secretly gone out of business) and take a look around. Because, if you’re anything at all like me, this quaint, seemingly heart-warming little dessert shop will come to haunt your thoughts. The Cupcake Cottage is located at: 5015 El Campo Avenue (at Camp Bowie Boulevard) Fort Worth, Texas 76107